What It Means to Fall in Love with Him over and over Again

Have you ever just had those moments when you feel like you're in a funk?

You know what I'm talking about, its that feeling when you just feel off, not yourself. Well as it turns out as Christians we get these things I like to call "faith funks". These "funks" can be described as that off feeling, but specifically focused on your faith. It's that moment when you question every and any aspect of your faith. You constantly reevaluate everything about what you believe and what it really means to you. Or even in some cases, the feeling of being stuck. Being trapped in a rut within my faith. It's like being stuck in quicksand and there is absolutely nothing you can do about it. And it's the most terrible feeling I think I've ever felt. Feeling as if my faith--the most important thing in my life--doesn't matter all that much. And that is the scariest feeling of all. Being trapped in a state of complacency. Feeling like reading His word, or even going to church isn't worth it. But alas there is hope, because this terrible feeling does eventually pass. But only by something that continues to amaze me each and every day...God's unending faithfulness.

I've found that the only way I ever get out of this dreadful state is sinking even lower into that hole. Falling hard in the darkest part of my faith and realizing over and over again that the only way out is to fall back in love with the only One who knows me inside and out. The Creator of EVERYTHING. He is the ONLY one who could possibly pull me out. The only thing that can push out the darkness that invades my heart. And knowing that is the greatest comfort I have. Now I'm not going to sit here and tell you that His rescue comes with lights beaming down from heaven, a booming voice telling me that He is all I need. No. His rescue comes from forcing yourself to believe in your head that you KNOW that God is always with you. It comes when you sit down and reread the same passage (sometimes 20 times over) from your daily reading because your heart has turned off the emotional connection to His word, until you get it. When you know it in your head you can push and pull at your heart until it realizes the same thing...that God IS good. That He IS the best thing about life. That this faith we choose to believe in IS 100% worth it.

Simple midnight, sit alone in the dark thoughts. God's unending faithfulness is truly awesome and I hope you get the chance to experience it too. He provides us with everything we need and that alone is comfort.

Much love,

Kaitlyn